You can see the stereotype now: mom dressed in drab purple sweatpants (the ones with the elastics on the ankles) and matching stained T-shirt, her hair in a messy ball held by a scrunchie, make-up less face, here eyes heavy with dark bags underneath. She looks disheveled, overwhelmed, and in need of some serious help from Phil Donahue. She’s schlepping the kids off to soccer, then ballet class and then back to soccer, ballet class and later, when they arrive home, the baby screaming and the kids fighting and smelling like freshly cut grass and sweat, she makes a hurried dinner of mac ‘n cheese (the ghetto kind from the box) and put the kiddies into bed before collapsing into a hit bath filled with Calgon (“Take Me Away!”).
If you are old enough to get even half of these references, you know that soccer moms, while they still exist, are pretty much heading toward extinction. And they are being replaced by the new–and much more organized (and more stylishly dressed) yoga moms. Everyone knows moms work hard. but now, moms are coping with the hard work of raising kids in different ways. You’ve seen her in Whole Foods. She’s run past you on your way to get the newest Chick Lit novel at the corner bookstore (where you can still find one anyway). She isn’t like all moms. But she’s real and you see her more and more these days. She’s Yoga Mom!
She’s dressed in a matching lululemon jacket and groove pants. Her hair is neatly tied back with one of those non-slip headbands. She’s still wearing a light coating of baby food and formula, but this tone seems to match her skin better than the baby rash lotion and 80′s hair mousse. The new Bon Iver album is playing on the car speakers. She’s dropping little Timmy off at karate before taking her baby girl to a Mommy & Me yoga class. She’s already caught the Dr. Oz episode where he talks about why yoga is good for you (among many things, it lubricates your joints). And when they all arrive home, they enjoy a box of Annie’s natural mac ‘n cheese. Luckily, Calgon is still around. Maybe she adds a scoopful of organic bath salts–just for good measure.
Maybe this isn’t the mom you knew, but she’s here to stay. At least until the next health/beauty/TV host fad comes along. In the meantime, about a month ahead of Mother’s Day, we salute you, moms…and we hate to spoil the surprise, but you’re not getting flowers this year. Bon Iver’s “Flume” will just have to do.
